Little Green Cap
by Windswift
Summary: Zelda and Link, the boy in the little green cap, go to take a basket of goodies to Link's sick grandfather who lives in a cottage in the middle of the woods.


Disclaimer: I don't own The Legend of Zelda

So my first diving-right-in foray into LoZ fanfic is part Minish Cap AU, part "eh I'll just use whatever's convenient," really mostly crack, and I am not actually sorry.

_**Little Green Cap**_

"_Hey_, Link! Hurry up!" Zelda hollers, swinging the basket until it bounces against her thigh. "What about your grandfather?"

Link is all about his grandfather. The two of them live in a cottage in the middle of the woods together, except for the times that Link is living in a tree he climbed up all by himself because he's been shooed out of the house because the forge is hot and it makes Link's hair go curly and smell funny and sometimes there are little sparks he sees from the corners of his eyes. Besides making swords, Link's grandfather also made him the green tunic that he wears absolutely everywhere, and a belt with lots of loops for sticking sticks through and other things like little glass bottles, and the green cap that matches his tunic and fits him just perfect and makes Link look heroic. Link always looks heroic in his green cap, even when Zelda gets mad and tugs it down over his eyes until his ears stick out funny.

Grandfather also understands that Link really very much needs to turn over this rock to see what's under it.

Zelda doesn't understand so much. She grabs Link's wrist and drags him. "Don't you want your grandfather to feel better?" she lectures, puffing a bit because Link is trying to make himself heavy but mainly he's just getting his butt dragged through the dirt. "We're going to bring him a nice nutritious lunch, but we _can't_ if it's not lunch anymore when we get there!"

Link has to hold his hat down with his free hand because Zelda keeps trying to knock it off his head with the lunch basket.

Somebody nearby laughs, from deep in his belly. "Well, you're in quite the hurry! Where are you two children rushing off to?" The somebody is big and tall and broad in the shoulders, with a face like a boar with little tusks and everything, and he's leaning on the sign at the fork up ahead, the one that says _Smith's House_ right next to a little arrow. Link points to it, because he can now that Zelda's stopped swinging the basket at his hat.

Ganon lifts his arm and looks down to read the sign. "I see, the Smith's house! Of course, with your little green cap, you must be his grandson, Link. And so this must be dear little Zelda."

Zelda curtseys and Link scrambles backward on his bottom because she has to let go of him and set down the basket to do so. "We've got very important business and you're standing right in the path, you know," she says.

"Ah, it's no good, no good." Ganon shakes his head and doesn't move aside, even when Zelda starts tapping her toe. "You see, I'm blocking the path because there's monsters all over this part of the woods. They'd eat the two of you right up in one mouthful! So if you're going to visit the Smith you can't go this way. But I suppose if you go _that_ way," he points to the other forest path, "it might take you a bit longer, but you'll still find the Smith's house alright, won't you."

Zelda bobs her chin. It's true. And if she gets eaten who knows how long Link's poor sick grandfather will be waiting until Link remembers he's in the middle of taking him a basket of lunch.

"Haste makes waste, you know," Ganon adds as she picks up the basket again. "It really is a nice day here in the forest. Don't worry so much about rushing around, and _enjoy_ yourselves. Look at the boy."

Link freezes at the feel of eyes on his back, turning slowly with his hands pressed to his lips and a blade of grass clapped between his thumbs, right in the middle of a squawking whistle that peters out off-key. Zelda sighs, her shoulders sagging. "Thank you, mister," she says before she trudges off.

And about half a minute later: "Link, hurry it _up_, you butt!"

Ganon chuckles while Link drops the scrub he'd been pulling up to see what was under it (usually it's roots but sometimes it's bright rupees or a bug or something!). It's the same full-bodied laugh rumbling from Ganon's big boar chest as earlier, except that this time it makes Link think of dark rustling shadows under the trees that always make his heart pound a little faster.

Anyway it looks like Zelda's found more rocks on the other path and they've got Link's name all over them!

The sun is hanging a little lower in the sky now when the trail through the woods widens into an open clearing with lots of tall grass, so at least there's nice shady spots around the edge for Zelda to sit in while Link stops to smell the flowers. Then he stops to pull his stick out of his belt and thrash them. The secret to a good slash isn't in the wrist but in throwing your whole arm into it!

A fairy darts up out of the grasses and Link pounces on the light and pokes it down into one of his bottles. He pops the cork in before the fairy can flutter out again and holds it as far as he can stretch his arm up above his head, waving it around for Zelda to see.

"You caught a fairy, that's very nice," Zelda says so that he'll stop shaking it around. He beams and goes back to whacking the grass. Zelda munches on a cookie from the lunch basket. Dragging Link is hard work and she needs a break, even if her father said they shouldn't dawdle in the woods.

Link's eyes catch something glinting in the grass as he spins his stick around again, and he ducks to scoop it up. It's a blue rupee, so it's worth five whole regular rupees! He bounces on his toes to show Zelda again.

Zelda hops up and brushes crumbs off the front of her skirt and dirt off the back. "Wow, Link, that's amazing! I bet your grandfather would think it was really amazing if you showed it to him too, huh?"

That is an absolutely great idea, because Zelda pretty much always has absolutely great ideas even if Link always insists on finding that out the hard way, and also because Link is pretty tone-deaf when it comes to sneakiness. He shoves the blue rupee in his pocket so he won't lose it before they get to Grandfather's house and hurries over to catch up with Zelda. He doesn't even mind that she's holding onto his hand while they walk because she grabbed his right one so his left hand is free to swing his stick at things as they go.

A handful of seeds that would be just perfect for the slingshot that Grandfather promised to make him and a spiraled seashell somehow mysteriously in the middle of the forest later, Link manages to snatch his green cap back out of Zelda's thieving fingers. He tugs it back on his head, puffing and panting and giving her dirty looks. All that running and chasing's made him hungry and a little tired.

So it's pretty lucky that Zelda is standing at the door of his and Grandfather's cottage, knocking and calling: "Master Smith, it's Zelda and Link! We brought you lunch!"

"Oh thank you, come in," his grandfather calls back, so Zelda lets herself and the lunch basket in and Link squeezes in behind her before she can try to shut the door on him.

Zelda stops a bit short of Grandfather's bed, where he's lying where Link left him, the covers pulled up to his chin. "Link's grandfather, you must really be ill! Your voice sounds all hoarse and your face has gone blue!" She jabs Link with the basket and he rubs his arm.

"It's because I'm under the weather, dear," Ganon wheedles, disguised in all the Smith's bedclothes. "Perhaps it's snowing."

"And, Link's grandfather, how squished your nose has gotten!" Zelda swings the basket at Link again, and this time he nips out of the way.

It takes all of Ganon's restraint not to wring his hands in anticipation under the covers. After all, he's got the Smith out of the way and these two fooled children right where he wants them. He tries not to preen too much as he replies, "That comes from blowing it so much."

Zelda clenches her fist around the handle of the basket until her knuckles go white. She grits out, "_And_, Link's grandfather, what _sharp-looking little tusks_ you seem to have got!"

The urge to gloat overcomes him; Ganon tosses off the blankets and jumps from the bed, rattling the dishes in the cupboard. "That's for dealing with little brats like you!"

Link is busy picking up the pots lined up at the foot of the bed and looking inside them, in case anything's changed since the last time he looked. Zelda stomps on his foot and swings the lunch basket, bashing it into Ganon's head with a war-shriek. "_Link, you dummy!_"

Link is a hero in his little green cap and he has a stick and also there's nothing new and exciting in their pots anyway, and Grandfather isn't sleeping in his bed anymore and that guy from the crossroads who looked like a monster himself is standing in the middle of Link's house. Link doesn't really know what's going on but Zelda is screaming, so he clambers up onto the bed and lays into Ganon with his stick for all he's worth, whap smack jab! Link flails his stick and Zelda slams the basket until Ganon runs out of the cottage saying all kinds of dirty words Link never gets to hear when anyone thinks he's listening.

They find Link's grandfather sitting behind the cottage, where Ganon dumped him after he tossed him out of bed. But he's feeling a little better now, thanks to the fresh air and sunshine, so they all have lunch from what's left of the basket. And Zelda apologizes for stomping on Link's foot even though it's all his fault for being so stupid in the first place.

~And they all lived happily ever after the end~


End file.
